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mztink03 |
#101 | ||||
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OMG, those had me ROFL!! Thanks I needed that!
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pixiedust14 |
#102 | ||||
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Glad I could make you laugh, Heather!
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mickeysangel49 |
#103 | ||||
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Another groaner, Schmitty!
Dawn - we must have a mutual friend - I got that same list of jokes about a week ago and I just haven't had the chance to post them here! Glad you got there first! |
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Schmitty1964 |
#104 | ||||
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Those ARE great, Dawn! Some good chuckles in there!
Here's today's entry: In the great desert lived a band of nomads. Their leader, Benny, had risen to his rank due to his magnificent beard. His people believed a man's strength and courage came from his beard, and thus the man with the biggest beard was their chief. After leading the band for many years, Benny began to fell uncomfortable wearing the beard, in this hot and dusty land. He wanted to shave it off, so he called his council together to get their advice. When he said he wanted to shave, the councilmen were shocked. One said, "Do you not remember the ancient legend, Sire. The leader who removes his beard is cursed and made into a piece of earthenware." Benny had heard this legend, but being a modern man, he scoffed at the tale. Being headstrong, he went ahead and cut and scraped away his once magnificent beard. As the final whisker was cut off, a huge dust storm came up. It lasted only a few seconds, and when it cleared, there was a man-sized clay vessel where only moments before had stood their leader. The council then knew the legend must be true. Their conclusion? "A Benny shaved is a Benny urned." Does This Signature Make My Butt Look Big?
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pixiedust14 |
#105 | ||||
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Hail the king of the groaners.....lol mickeysangel - my aunt is the queen of all forwarders.....so it probably came from her or one of my old co-workers, lol. Funny how fast those get
forwarded, huh?
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pixiedust14 |
#106 | ||||
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For all of you who have ever ordered a cake from Walmart (I know I have, and I can totally see this happening!):
Wal-Mart Cake
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mztink03 |
#107 | ||||
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Hey Dawn, I can't see the pic!
Schmitty that was too funny!! Hail to the chief of all groaners!
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pixiedust14 |
#108 | ||||
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Darn it...I can see the pic! I hate when that happens.......
Yup, those are the exactly words...in frosting! ![]()
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mztink03 |
#109 | ||||
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ROFL, only Walmart would do something that stupid!!
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pixiedust14 |
#110 | ||||
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Like I said, totally could see it happening.....they misspelled Colin's name a year ago for his birthday...even though I spelled it 5 times. So....I wasn't surprised at all! ROFL! ![]()
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LaLaRoo78 |
#111 | ||||
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Ok I don't have a joke but it is a funny story.
My girlfriends and I were having lunch one day and we were talking about a children's ABC book that my one friend was reading to her son. She said when it came to Z they had a picture of a Zuchinni. We commented on how that was unusual since when we were growing up all the books usually had a Zebra in it for the letter Z. Then our other friend said yeah they usually have a Zebra or xylophone but I've never seen a zuchinni. Neither one of us said anything to her. Guess she did not realize that xylophone starts with and X. We had a good laugh after she left and will pull that out of the vault soon. (She also said one time when we were in Canada what do I know I don't speak Canadian. Someone was speaking in French. We bring that up often too) |
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pixiedust14 |
#112 | ||||
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ROFL Michele!
I love funny friend stories! My best friend is constantly reminded of the time, way back when Marty was a smoker and so was she....they were on our balcony having a cigarette, while another friend of mine and I were inside talking to them through the screen door. Sarah turned to come in and BAM...the girl ricochetted off of the screen door and back into Marty! ROFL! I was literally... The girl had screen marks on her face.
It's been 11 years.....and I STILL bring it up! Poor girl is never gonna live it down.
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mztink03 |
#113 | ||||
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ROFLMAO!!! I had a girl from Oklahoma convinced that I could only see color in one of my eyes. She wasn't exactly the brightest bulb in the pack but when I
get questions about my eyes I can't help it. She asked if I was born with two different colored eyes and if I could see color out of both of them. WAY TO
LEAVE YOURSELF OPEN!! So with a straight poker face I told her that I could ony see color in my green eye and black & white in my brown eye. She believed
me and I still laugh about that to this day!!
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mickeysangel49 |
#114 | ||||
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LOL - I couldn't see the picture either, so I'm glad you wrote it out. Too funny.
The other stories are all hysterical! The Master of all groaners strikes again!! LOL This one pales in comparison, but is still amusing: As Jesus traveled the country, he met many amazing people. One day he came to a village and continually heard people talking about a man there who made the most beautiful clothing in the land. So Jesus went to visit this man, whose name was Finkelstein. Jesus was amazed at the rich colors and designs the man had, and he even asked him to make him a new robe for himself. At the same time, Finkelstein told Jesus how he was impressed with his teachings, that Jesus should put them into books so people would have them forever. So they decided to go into business together and build a huge store for their merchandise. The only problem was, they could not agree on a name. Should it be "Jesus & Finkelstein"? Or perhaps "Finkelstein & Jesus"? After many days of discussion and disagreement, they finally found a solution that made them both happy. And they called the store "Lord & Taylor"
Last Edited By: mickeysangel49 Thu, Jul 3, 2008 04:10 PM.
Edited 1 time.
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LaLaRoo78 |
#115 | ||||
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LOL Great stories, Heather and Dawn!!
Good one, Heidi! |
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pixiedust14 |
#116 | ||||
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Heather - that is SO something Marty would do.....rofl!
Heidi - lol....good one! ![]()
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mztink03 |
#117 | ||||
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LOL- Heidi, that was too funny!
Thanks Dawn, i've had some strange questions posed to me about my eye color.
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pixiedust14 |
#118 | ||||
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Heather, I think it's cool that you have two different colored eyes....it's unusual! But.....people are not always the sharpest crayons in the box!
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pixiedust14 |
#119 | ||||
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Here's a good one......
As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde catches up. ![]()
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mztink03 |
#120 | ||||
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ROFLMAO!! I know what the salt trucks look like so I would never be that Blond!!! LOL
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